Hey, sisters, I’ve discovered a gold mine, a precious jewel, a fountain of delight, and y’all are the first ones I want to share it with.
Y’all ready? Lean your sweet ears this way.
I’ve discovered how to take a whole year off for play, self-renewal, and having a general hoot.
Do I hear you whining that it’s not fair? I know: you don’t have the money. You have to keep on working. Your partner/kid/boss won’t let you. Hold on a sec. It’s not what you think it is, and it’s something you can do, too. I promise.
It all started when a good friend started dating a fabulously wealthy, wonderful guy. And this sweetie offered to make my friend into a kept woman.
Well, this raised Sharon’s feminist hackles. “How could he offer that,” she asked me?
Yours Truly was pretty much jumping up and down for joy and envy. Why not? I asked her. Why the hell not?
It may happen, or not. But it provoked in me a spectacular whining and self-pity attack. Poor me, I was a single mom for so many years. Poor me, I’ve given so much to others. You know the tune.
I allowed myself to thrash around until I thoroughly bored myself with my whining. I recognized a real need in the self-pity, and invited my wisest self to come up with a solution to my dilemma:
How could I take a sabbatical when 1.The money for a whole year off just ain’t there and 2. I don’t want to take a year off from my work -- I love it!
I slept with the question and my wisest self delivered. I discovered the next morning that I could take a year’s sabbatical while I continued to enjoy my work.
How, you might ask?
Here’s what I realized in my wonderful bed (one of my favorite places to spend quality time) drinking fresh coffee made by my wonderful husband: There’s the sabbatical proper. AND there’s a sabbatical frame of mind and heart.
That’s what I could enjoy for the next year, a deeply pleasured and soulful Sabbatical Mind.
I made a list of everything I’d do with a work-free sabbatical year: Read more novels. Take more naps. Knit, go to the beach, watch the clouds, make love in the afternoon, garden, stay in bed all day, just sit and smell the flowers like Ferdinand the Bull.
I was astonished when I finished the list. I realized, with Sabbatical Mind, I could do all of those!
So right then and right there, sipping my New Orleans chicory cafe au lait, I declared myself to be in Sabbatical Mind until next Summer Solstice, 2009.
This last month has been a hoot. I’ve read three novels. I’ve napped. I’ve picked up knitting again (and hours in the yarn stores), and have ordered a weaving loom, something I’ve been so wanting to get back to. I’ve spent long lazy hours with my hands in the gorgeous loam of our garden. I’m watching clouds. I’m playing with friends.
Nothing beats being in Sabbatical Mind.
And—here’s one of the best parts—I’m bringing oodles more playfulness and delight to my coaching and psychotherapy therapy practice
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So how does this actually look, you ask?
- I’m enjoying new adventures with friends and David, like attending Chocolate Expos and rowing on Greenlake.
- With a free half hour I head out to the garden with my knitting (oh bliss!). Sometimes I knit, sometimes I just listen to the finches and robins.
- Instead of rushing to get through the laundry so I can get to something better (a process which I now realize ties me up in knots and nullifies the benefits of what I’m rushing to get to), I stroll through the laundry. I’ve rediscovered the delightful scent of clothes fresh from the drier.
- Last Monday was one of those over-the-top, gorgeous Seattle summer days. I was writing and feeling grinchy about having to be inside. Hey, I remembered, I’m on sabbatical! So I hied myself and my trusty mini laptop to Greenlake, where I spent a heavenly afternoon enjoying the lake, the ducks, and the passersby. I wrote better than I had in months. Greenlake is now my office.
- If an errand takes more time than usual, it’s no big deal. Hey, I’m on sabbatical. I’ve got a whole year for pleasure, play, and renewal. In light of that, what’s a line at the grocery store or bank? In fact, since I’m on sabbatical right now, I might as well enjoy standing in line. And I do.
- Last weekend while gardening I found myself feeling sad about my daughter leaving the country for a year. Instead of pushing it aside to finish the bed, I realized I had a whole year for gardening, and the sweetest thing I could do for myself was to go have a good cry. And so I did. (And felt so much better afterwards that I went back to gardening and enjoyed it even more.)
I’m learning all the time. I promise to let y’all know what I’m learning, as I’m learning it. And I can’t wait to start helping other wonderful women enjoy Sabbatical Mind, too.
I’m also thinking (but not making any decisions...after all, I’ve got the whole year to think about it) that I’m having such a marvelous time I may go permanently on Sabbatical Mind.
I’ll let you know next Summer Solstice.